My friend, Scott, sent me a text today asking if I was going to join him and his partner, Sean, at a 4th of July party on July 5th at their friend’s house in Vineland. Now, he asked me this before but it was when Matt and I were together so I wasn’t sure how to respond. I still hadn’t heard from Matt and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go to this party stag, so-to-speak. Well he needed an answer right away so I said yes.
I can’t “not do” things just because I haven’t heard from Matt. Besides, my not doing things list was getting way too long to handle. I was discussing this with Heather over dinner tonight. I asked her what she thought about me calling Matt and she told me it was strictly up to me. As far as she was concerned, Matt was probably being insecure and feeling that I didn’t want to see him because I hadn’t contacted him, a sort of catch-22, if you know what I mean. I was feeling that she was probably right when my cell phone rang. I bet you can guess who it was.
Yep. It was Matt. And yep, he figured I had written him off since I hadn’t called him. In fact, he saw me on Gay.com and because I didn’t say hello, he figured I was ignoring him on purpose. The funny thing is that I went on Gay.com over the weekend to see if he was on it. I didn’t see him so I wasn’t ignoring him but he was on there and thought I was ignoring him and well you can see how it just all got way too complicated.
Anyway, last night he remembered I said I was blogging and it had something to do with blue skies. After searching Google for a while, he stumbled upon my blog. After reading the post where I wrote about him and discussing it with his friend, Steve, he decided that we both were just being insecure and he would call me the next day.
So there you have it: two insecure boobs who let their worries get the best of them. He came over last night and we talked about it some more. He admits he’s insecure and so do I. He doesn’t call a lot because he’s not a phone person and I’m the same way. He did admit he missed my martinis. We are so alike in some ways it’s scary. Anyway, we decided that we just won’t let this happen again. If he wants to talk to me, he’ll call me. If I’m worried that he isn’t calling me, then I’ll call him. It’s simple. I should have been able to see that. It must have been because of all of those trees.